Randomness Inc.

Ever since Zombieland I’ve been craving a good twinkie, and I finally, today, the seventeenth (according to this blog, eighteenth) of December, I got my hands on 10 of the little goodies.  Yes.  You hear me right. TEN.  I intrepidly cracked open the box and to my surprise there the little gems were.  I almost expected something to be wrong with them, seeing as well… I had been watching Zombieland, but I whipped out a few and they looked blessedly normal.  Three or four later I contently closed the box and cracked open my nearby bottle of cold Chai to wash down the wonder of what remained from my delightful expedition into the unknown.

Of course, no twinkie adventure would be complete without the small package that was open already and contained the dried up remains of an extra half of a twinkie that had no business being where it was.  I eyed it and tenaciously peeled back the wrapper, slowly moving the strange apparition towards the gateway to my gastronomic passage.  It looked willing, almost begging me to eat it, inching out of its package slowly.  Inches, centimeters, millimeters from my mouth and then a cockroach popped out.  I mulled it over for a second, but decided that the cream on the inside was a bit too white… so I threw it away and grabbed the next package, palpable electricity of excitement dancing through my arms and fingers.

It was good.  It tasted like the physical embodiment of good intentions… Slowly paving my small intestines with a little yellow brick road leading straight to… well.  something not so nice as a gumdrop forest.

At any rate.  Now I am drinking some delightful sweet tea, which is essentially the greatest drink this world has ever known.  Trying to describe it with flowery words and meaningless fluff could not do it justice, so I won’t even try.  It’s good stuff.

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   July 1, 2010 at 2:49 am

   
   

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